#Masturbation

Apr

2022

My special sock

From: Free Guy

Mom! Do not touch that sock! I swear to god, if you touch that sock you will be in therapy for the rest of your life! No! That's my special sock! Put it down!

Channing Tatum (Revenjamin Buttons)

#Mother

#Socks

#Therapy

#Masturbation

Feb

2022

One man is not an orchestra! –Who needs orchestras? You can do it all with a keyboard, an amp, and enough power. –You want to play all by yourself? –You don't need anybody else. –That's not music, Martelli, that's masturbation.

Albert Hague (Shorofsky) | Lee Curreri (Bruno Martelli)

Jun

2021

The things dad would say

From: Young Frankenstein

I'll never forget my old dad when these things would happen to him. The things he'd say to me. –What did he say? –What the hell are you doing in the bathroom day and night?! Why don't you get out of there and give someone else a chance?!

Marty Feldman (Igor) | Gene Wilder (Dr. Frederick Frankenstein)

Jun

2020

The wiggler

From: Duckman: Private Dick / Family Man

Episode: Grandma-ma's Flatulent Adventure (1996) (Season 3, Episode 3)

I've reached the age where most of my waking hours are devoted to... how to put this in acceptable terms... working the wiggler.

Dweezil Zappa (Ajax Duckman)

Aug

2017

A little spank

From: The Andy Griffith Show

Episode: One-Punch Opie (1962) (Season 3, Episode 14)

Well, meantime, like you say, a little spank here and there ain't gonna hurt nothin'.

Don Knotts (Deputy Barney Fife)

Jun

2016

Touching myself tonight

From: Deadpool

(gasp) Ohh! I'm touching myself tonight.

Ryan Reynolds (Wade Wilson / Deadpool)

#Sex

#Masturbation

#Innuendo

Jul

2014

Particular to you

From: Bones

Do all boys keep their masturbatory aids in their shoes, or is that particular to you?

Emily Deschanel (Dr. Temperance 'Bones' Brennan)

#Shoes

#Masturbation

#Sarcasm

Jul

2014

Touch 'em

From: Monsters University

Yeah, I wanna touch 'em.

Charlie Day (Art)

Apr

2010

I don't find you attractive

From: The Invention Of Lying

(footsteps) –Wow. –I just masturbated. –That makes me horny. I hope this date ends in sex. –I don't find you attractive. –Oh.

Jennifer Garner (Anna McDoogles) | Ricky Gervais (Mark Bellison)

#Sex

#Masturbation

#Attraction

Mar

2010

I was just masturbating

From: The Invention Of Lying

(door opens) Hi. You're early. I was just masturbating.

Jennifer Garner (Anna McDoogles)

#Sex

#Time

#Masturbation

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Born Today

Monica Bellucci • 30 Sep 1964

Maia Brewton • 30 Sep 1977

Truman Capote • 30 Sep 1924

Lacey Chabert • 30 Sep 1982

Vondie Curtis-Hall • 30 Sep 1956

Fran Drescher • 30 Sep 1957

Jenna Elfman • 30 Sep 1971

Deborah Kerr • 30 Sep 1921

Mahaley Patel • 30 Sep 1987

Eric Stoltz • 30 Sep 1961

Died Today

Turhan Bey • 30 Sep 2012

Died This Year

06 Jan 2022 • Sidney Poitier

09 Jan 2022 • Dwayne Hickman

10 Jan 2022 • Gary Waldhorn

18 Jan 2022 • Peter Robbins

29 Jan 2022 • Howard Hesseman

24 Feb 2022 • Sally Kellerman

02 Mar 2022 • Johnny Brown

03 Mar 2022 • Tim Considine

13 Mar 2022 • William Hurt

12 Apr 2022 • Gilbert Gottfried

27 Jun 2022 • Joe Turkel

08 Jul 2022 • Gregory Itzin

24 Jul 2022 • David Warner

27 Jul 2022 • Tony Dow

30 Jul 2022 • Nichelle Nichols

23 Sep 2022 • Louise Fletcher

Top 20 Quotes - Today

We have a problem on our hands, from: The Bridge On The River Kwai
Views today: 26

Maniacal laugh, from: The Muppets (2011)
Views today: 10

SFX: Hanna-Barbera boing boing sound, from: Sound Effects
Views today: 8

Idiot!, from: Napoleon Dynamite
Views today: 8

Ugly protesters, from: Zoolander
Views today: 8

Needs some WD-40, from: King of the Hill
Views today: 7

Every day is Halloween, from: Malcolm In The Middle
Views today: 7

Sugar tits, from: The Cowboys
Views today: 6

Can I show my new friend my bedroom?, from: The Venture Bros.
Views today: 6

Body count, from: Casino Royale
Views today: 5

You had to be big shots, from: Weird Science
Views today: 5

Big pickle, from: The Angry Beavers
Views today: 5

Doomed from the start, from: Back To School
Views today: 5

Condition Red, from: Dr. Strangelove
Views today: 4

In the mood for a party, from: Strange Days
Views today: 4

Do we care it's illegal?, from: Birdgirl
Views today: 4

WTF knuckles, from: Deadpool 2
Views today: 4

Take a bath and comb your hair, from: To Wong Foo, Thanks for Everything! Julie Newmar
Views today: 4

Holy bijou!, from: Batman: The Original Series
Views today: 3

This is my destiny, from: Astro Boy
Views today: 3

Top 20 Shows (since 2012)

Archer / Total views: 87,223

Family Guy / Total views: 43,305

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Sound Effects / Total views: 34,781

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Up / Total views: 32,976

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Babylon 5 / Total views: 27,456

Blazing Saddles / Total views: 26,977

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South Park / Total views: 25,298

2001: A Space Odyssey / Total views: 23,424

The Jetsons / Total views: 21,049

The Venture Bros. / Total views: 20,973

Battlestar Galactica: The Original Series / Total views: 19,830

Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy (vinyl) / Total views: 18,700

3rd Rock From The Sun / Total views: 17,027

The 6 Million Dollar Man / Total views: 16,819

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Daria / Total views: 15,955

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