Clark Wilhelm Griswold, Jr.

I want him brought from his happy holiday slumber over there on Melody Lane with all the other rich people, and I want him brought right here. With a big ribbon on his head! And I want to look him straight in the eye and I want to tell him what a cheap, lying, no-good, rotten, four-flushing, low-life, snake-licking, dirt-eating, inbred, overstuffed, ignorant, blood-sucking, dog-kissing, brainless, dickless, hopeless, heartless, fat-assed, bug-eyed, stiff-legged, spineless, worm-headed sack of monkey shit he is! Hallelujah! Holy shit! Where's the Tylenol?